The 3rd edition prints of Native Temptations are soon gonna be printed! The 2nd edition prints are out on the way already with so many supports. I thank you all!
Recalling back, the 1st edition was out in just a few days. The 2nd (special BLACK edition) was also waited by more. Thanks to the CAD team for helping me out on this all. And now the 3rd one is gonna be printed soon! with new cover 
Cheers!
It hurts. Love hurts. The weirdest thing happened this morning was I woke up with tears in my eyes, rolling down my cheek. I knew I must have been dreaming of you again. Love is really like a quicksand; the deeper you fall in it, the harder it is to get out. If I never met you, I wouldn’t like you. If I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t love you. If I didn’t love you, I wouldn’t miss you…but I do. I miss you so much… At first, I never wanted to say goodbye because I still wanted to try. I never wanted to give up because I feel that we can still take it. And I never say that I no longer love you because I know that I still can’t let you go out of my heart. Baby, I need you so much closer…
As I close my eyes, I can feel everything. Our love that was once beautiful, a deep affection that have sealed our hearts together forever. I can’t hold my tears any longer as I recall our memories together. It hurts so much like a blade piercing through my soul. Alone I’m trapped in sorrow without you beside me. Tears kept flowing down my cheek. I try to feel that you’re right beside me, comforting me. But all I can do is dream of you more and more…
Oceans apart, day after day and I slowly go insane. I hear your voice on the line but it doesn’t stop the pain. If I see you next to never, how can we say forever? Wherever you go, whatever you do I will be right here waiting for you. Whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks, I will be right here waiting for you. I took for granted all the times that I thought would last somehow. I hear the laughter, I taste the tears but I can’t get near you now. Can’t you see it baby, you’ve got me going crazy. I wonder how we can survive this romance. But in the end, if I’m with you, I’ll take the chance.
If you knew you could open a door to anywhere, where would you want to go love? … Let’s find some beautiful place to get lost.
1. I love when my heart smiles, but the best of all, it smiles because of you.
Had a lovey-dovey day today. lol. Actually, I had a rest today. Well at least a part of the day. Lassie was busy doing her stuff and we just sort of ease it out a little. Hmm, finished the footage today! yay! rendering the film to an HD takes mega-load of time.. gosh. Anyways, I was twiddling again with my stuffs while waiting for the film to finish processing and also getting myself easy on bed. Here’s some images…
Phew, now then. It’s midnight already. I probably go to sleep again haha. I still feel tired since I’ve not been getting enough rest for the past couple of weeks. Besides, tomorrow I’m meeting some friends on the afternoon. Going to have lunch with John then goes on with Fifi and I’m meeting up with Nadya afterwards. And what’s more tomorrow my assistants and crews are planning on to get together, relax once in a while. We’re planning to go to the movies watch New Moon up in the premiere I guess. Still don’t know if the full crew can all come tomorrow. Still waiting for my DOP to text me and also Nadya’s.. Well, we’ll see what happens.. big day tomorrow (definitely Ciao!
Now, as I recall on my research from time to time, I had saved this copy of a little story of Love and Time. I forgot where the source is but I want to share this with you all. It’s very nice and very inspirational, I hope you will like it.
Once Upon a time there is an island where all the feelings lived : Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge and all the others including Love. One day it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so all prepared their boats and left. Love is the only one who stayed.
Love wanted to persevere until the last moment. When the island is almost sinking. Love decided to ask for help. Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said, “Richness, can you take me with you?” Richness answered, “No, I can’t. There is a lot of gold and silver in my boat. There is no place here for you”.
Love decided to ask vanity who was also passing by in the beautiful vessel, “Vanity, please help me!” “I can’t help you Love. You are all wet and might damage my boat,” Vanity answered.
Sadness was close by so Love asked for help, “Sadness, let me go with you.” “Oh…Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!”
Happiness passed by Love too, but she was so happy that she did not even hear when Love called her!
Suddenly there was a voice, “Come Love, I will take you.” It was an elder. Love felt so blessed and overjoyed that he even forgot to ask the elder her name. When they arrived at dry land, the elder went her own way.
Love, realizing how much he owed the elder asked Knowledge, another elder, “Who helped me?” “It was Time” Knowledge replied.
Time? Asked Love. But why did Time helped me? Knowledge smiled with deep Wisdom and answered, “because only Time is capable of understanding how great Love is.”
I hope this touched your heart.
It’s time for a classic inspiration! I’m still with the film editor right now. Feels that siiting have been forever! LOL Well, I got bored and started to open up some pics and see what I can twidle with. Oh, but before that – turned on my iTunes and played one of the classic melodies…Jose Mari Chan’s Beautiful Girl….. Oh man, I love that song. If you never heard it before, you should listen to it! Well, here’s the tunes….
Beautiful girl, whenever you are
I knew when I saw you, you had opened the door
I knew that I’d love again after a long, long while
I’d love again
you said ‘hello’ and I turned to go
but something in your eyes left my heart beating so
I just knew that I’d love again after a long, long while
I’d love again
It was destiny’s game, for when love finally came on
I rushed in line only to fine that you were gone
wherever you are i fear that i might
have lost you forever, like a song in the night
now that I’ve loved again, after a long, long while
I’ve loved again
beautiful girl, I’ll search on for you
till all of your loveliness in my arms come true
you’ve made me in love again, after a long, long while
in love again
and I’m glad that is you…
hmmmmm… beautiful girl..
One of the chapters on my Scattered Love book; I gotta say that it was one of my favorite songs ever and has been one of my inspiration in doing this “Scattered Love” project. I remembered one time when this song was just released, I would see them in MTV and Channel V. I would sing them with passion and I had kept it in ‘repeat one’ mode on my iTunes. lol Definitely a sad song indeed 
. Who could ever imagine not able to wake up in the morning, leaving the one you love so much forever without telling her? It kept me thinking whether the love I gave her in this world is enough. Leaving her alone so suddenly, I wonder whether the love I gave her in the past is gonna be enough to last if tomorrow never comes :’(… I hope this will never happen with me 
. So, I hope, for you lovers out there, tell your lovers that you love them. Share with them the joy and sorrow for it is the true meaning of love. Tell them anything that you’re thinking of, before the day comes when you’re all too late…
Sometimes late at night
I lie awake and watch her sleeping
She’s lost in peaceful dreams
So I turn out the lights and lay there in the dark
And the thought crosses my mind
If I never wake up in the morning
Would she ever doubt the way I feel
About her in my heart
If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way
To show her every day
That she’s my only one
If my time on earth were through
And she must face the world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes
‘Cause I’ve lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed
So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there’s no second chance
To tell her how I feel
If tomorrow never comes
So tell that someone that you love
Just what you’re thinking of
If tomorrow never comes
I got a holiday at last!! Yay! It’s a 4 days break after joining the production of “Red Horse”. 4 families went to join on a journey to the far north of Kalimantan, near the borders between Malaysia and Indonesia. There withstand an island that was once deep below sea level but rises again as time ticks by. It is the Derawan Island, a sanctuary of the sea turtles. Well, let’s cut it short first… I’m gonna display up some photos of our journey later on in my next post. Now in this one are portraits of dr. Eka J Wahjoepramono that I took personally during this holiday trip. Before it was his usual portrait as a doctor, some taken during his operations, etc… BUT now…. He’s on SOS! Looking for help on a stranded island!
Well, there you go! The unique dr Eka in action! hehe.. Well, there are some more pics of him during our underwater sea travel We got some pics when we were diving up with the giant sea turtles and the cute jellyfishes up in Kakaban Island. So, more to come! That’s it for now
“Isabel” (42cm x 50xm), Medium: Charcoal
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I was taking a break from work and college for two days already. I was up all night with my friends up at Grand Cafe the other night; pretty much had fun. Being busy is not good at all, stressing up my minds and muscles. Man I wished I had a long holiday once in a while. So that night I saw my lil-lassie brought along her cute little Diana F+ camera. She twiggled and played with it all the time and baby… that interest me a lot. I thought I might have one. So I did, she went with me to the store and I grabbed myself a new Diana F+. Oops.. wait.. girls are still girls… there were 3 kinds of the camera. The normal Diana F+ and the other two were the special edition ones… The Snowcat and I forgot the other one (all i could remember that it was red and had horns). Well, Snowcat edition looked to me that it was for girls. The other one was more for boys [machoism i called it]. And the normal one looks more professional. I wanted to get the normal one but not til’ Lesley forced me to buy the Snowcat version!!! ……. BANG! I did bought it. I can’t believe I really did get the Snowcat Edition!! arghh!
Anyways, we went back to the cafe and join the others too. It was going on really late and we all decided to go home and get a rest. But now in my case… Lesley and I decided to WALK home! (Its really a long way but we wanted to talk and enjoy the night. lol) It was a beautiful night for us until we reached the park where we accidentally met our friend Isabel. She was crying heavily beneath the rowan trees and also heavilly drunk. So, we dediced to help her out. We brought her back to my place and we all rest the night out.
BUMP! Ouch! Lesley was jumping up on my bed waking me up…”breakfast ready.. breakfast ready…”. So we had our late breakfast Lesley prepared for me as usual. Isabel was there too. She felt better actually after we talked through her problems. –> –> fast forward… Isabel suddenly asked me for a shoot. And I thought that yeah its a good time to play with my new toy the Snowcat ^^ Hehe… besides, I got a homework shoot from college to do, so I had her as the model for my work and plus its been quite a time I haven’t photograph Isabel. So we went on for the shoot! More than that, Lesley pulled out her gears also and she started sketching right away. [looks like the photographer and the illustrator got themself in working mode again for homeworks this time! haha. a model to photograph and sketch!]
Later on the night, I saw Lesley still busy finishing up her sketch of Isabel… Surprisingly, I didn’t know why but I suddenly got my hands itching to pick up my charcoals again! However, I was confused of whom to draw… I drew my lil-lassie’s pics like millions of times already. So, I browse up the net for a while looking for a pic that could somehow inspire me. Then I ended up at this image of a girl so alluring. I think it was for some kind of advertorial or such. But I really like the pic; simple yet beautiful. So I begin sketching it…. Now what’s funny is well, I drew it exactly like the photo in my screen but the face really looked like Isabel! Haha.. So in the end I ended up sketching Isabel! lol Well, I still have to process the film from the camera but here is the little sketch I made with my lovely charcoals again *Thanks to Isabel for being a great model and inspiration for lil-lassie and me ^^ :*
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AH! Yes I forgot one thing. When we had the session with Isabel, we manage to put on a music too. A song sang by Il Divo entitled “Isabel”! hahaha! And we had the iTunes to repeat the song over and over again for over 2 hours maybe. ) Well, here’s the lyrics to “Isabel”. (And for some reason, the song matched to what had happened to her. I hope and pray that she’ll feel better soon.)
Wow. I had to say, I don’t know how, but i did pick up my charcoals again after maybe 2 or 3 years of not sketching and drawing. Ever since I got Lesley helping me in all the illustrations I didn’t bother to take my pencil or even charcoals. But, it was fun. This was just a fun sketch though. Got inspired by my dream, and saw this wonderful photo… sorry I couldn’t find who the original artist/photographer who made it, but full credits! I sketched it just for fun in a piece of paper. hehe. hope you like it. Sorry if its a bad sketch. I haven’t been using my charcoals for years already. :p lol hehe.
*hmmm, thinking about the picture, YES they’re all girls except 1 guy. That’s why I found it most interesting. its a very nice picture but my naughty little thoughts gave me an inside of The LUST Supper, instead of the LAST. lol hahaha.-joke*
The Last Supper, 2009
First of all, I wanted to dedicate this to my most beloved little prince, the King of Pop, Michael Jackson, whom have “gone to soon” last June 25th. On this eve of Jackson’s one month rememberance, I made this set inspired by his song, ‘SMILE‘, which is also what we all know that this song was his favorite song. Michael was someone who was born great and had achived such greatness. He had “Heal The World”, make us aware the true meaning of togetherness that “We Are The World”. He was more of a hero to me. An icon I will never forget. Through his songs he has given the world so much – to me; such an inspiration. We know that our ‘Michael was one of a kind. Thinking back to when we met and in the many times we spend time together. We would have fun no matter where we were. We had a bond. We never collaborated together. We never performed together or dance on the same stage although he did tried in vain one night to unsuccessfully teach me the moonwalk and he just basically shook his head and cross his arms at my attempt. We never filmed a video or recorded a song but what we did do was LAUGH. It was a competition to see who can make the other one laugh more or be sillier. Michael loved to laugh. His heart will just burst out of him when he was laughing. MJ’s laugh was the sweetest and purest laugh of anyones I have ever known. His sense of humor was delightful. We made it fun and we made it real. He loved to be teased. Seeing him smile made you feel like everything was going to be alright.
To the outside world, Michael was a genius with unchallenged ability. To the people who were lucky enough to know him personally, he was caring and funny, honest, pure, non-jaded, and he was a lover of life. He cared so deeply for his family, and his friends and his fans. He was often referred to as the King. but the Michael that I knew always remembered me more of the little prince. “What moves me so deeply about this sleeping prince is his loyalty to a flower. The image of a rose shining within him like the flame within a lamp, even when he’s a sleep. And I realize he was even more fragile than I had thought. Lamps must be protected. A gust of wind can blow them out.” Michael’s sensitivity was even more extraordinary than his talent and his true truth resided in his heart. As the little prince also said “Eyes are blind. You have to look with the heart. What’s most important is invisible.” Michael saw everything with his heart. Michael’s favorite song was not one of the countless masterpieces that he gave us. but it was a song that Charlie Chaplin wrote for the movie Modern Times. It’s called SMILE. And there’s a line in the song, “Smile though your heart is aching.” Today, although our hearts are aching, we need to look up. Where he is undoubtedly perched in the crescent moon. and WE NEED TO SMILE.’
SMILE
Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, even though it’s breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You’ll get by…
If you smile with your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile if you’ll just…
Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That’s the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what’s the use of crying
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile
If you’ll just…
Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, even though it’s breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You’ll get by…
If you smile
Through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile
If you’ll just Smile…
That’s the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what’s the use of crying
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile
If you’ll just Smile…
to my families; mom, dad, brothers and sisters, uncles, aunts, grandpas and grandmas. To my assistants, crews, helpers; Antonny Liem, Dharsana Sulistijo, Alex Frits, Adhi Wibowo, Imam Subandi, Wahyu Hidayat, Nur Ichsan, Catur Haji, Irfan Andi, Wiyanto, Herman, Aris, Purwanto, Slamet, Sumali, Sugiono, etc. To my special sister Dominique Agisca. To my talents and friends (which are far too many too mention); Jo Elaine, Ditto Purnomo, Ranita Angkosubroto, Fitria Yusuf, Lotta, Monica, Ilmira, Lani, Sebastian Gunawan, Indra Leonardi, Geoff Ang, Zhang Jingna, Michael Ting, Henry Riady, Malvin A L, Ridge, Nico, Grace, Edo, Ruben, Butet, Krisdayanti, Uthe, Titi DJ, Addie MS, Luna, Rachmat Gobel, etc… To my “super-friends”; Christian Bale, Lily, Jess Stam, Natasha P, Snejana, Michael Rosen, Roberto Cavalli and all to the NT team members and still going on…. TO ALL MY OTHER FRIENDS and SUPPORTERS! – I give you all my precious smile. Let’s all SMILE!!!!
NOVEMBER SYMPHONY
It will be exactly like this, this life, this room,
all of it the same. At sunrise, dull as a corpse,
the bird of time staring from the copse,
the hollow fountain ringing as servants resume
their chores in the cold. O, terrible youth! The heart, empty,
just as in this life. And the voices of winter,
voices of the poor, calling from their ragged city.
And singing to himself, the window-mender.
From under her dirty bonnet the old woman, fragile,
screaming her fishes, and beneath his blue apron,
a man will set down his wheelbarrow, spit upon
his calloused hands and bellow, an unforgiving angel—
just as it is here. This life, this table—
Goethe, inkstand, the stink of time,
paper, the woman who reads your mind,
O my child, the pen and portrait, Bible.
Exactly like this life. This same garden,
shadowed, overgrown, thick. And at noon
people gather, hungry, pleased to take part in
the communal life, though no one
knows another, but each knows this: one is dressed
as for a party and opening the door, enter
the night, alone, without love, without lantern.
Exactly as in this life. The same dim way through the forest,
midday in autumn, along the forest trail,
where it turns, downward, cautious as a woman
bending to gather flowers that might help heal—
listen, we will meet again as it once was when, when …
And you will have forgotten the dress you wore, its color …
But what happiness I’ve found has been brief and spare.
O, you will dress in pale lilac, my beautiful sorrow,
the flowers in your hat, tiny, steeped in dolor –
I will not recall their names, all of them foreign,
unnameable but one, the forget-me-not, asleep
in the weedy ravines of the hide-and-seek
world, just as now, left alone, an orphan.
And before you, a dark path will soak
up the splash of water falling in torrents.
And I’ll speak to you then of the Rabbi of Bacharach,
of the city built on water, of nights in Florence.
And there, redolent of rain, where the wall’s collapsed,
flowers on their hollow stems quiver
and the fat fallen weeds, drowsy, nap
by the silent river.
Portrait of Addie MS, Journey to Syndey Opera House, 2009
